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Old 11th June 2019, 07:33   #111 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Very similar to the Thetford in our motor home , do not laugh we use the cheapest biological clothes washing liquid . The fragrance helps and does neutralise the residue in the tank .

Good cheap dodge referred to on many motorhome forums .

Best of

Steve
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Old 11th June 2019, 09:01   #112 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Homecraft Double Ended Bed Grab Rail, Assistive Device for Getting In and Out of Bed

Double loop to assist users getting in and out of the bed
Base fits between bed platform and mattress
Adjustable width metal base
Suitable for single or double beds
Capacity: 108 kg
This product is eligible for VAT relief in the UK
Disabled or chronically sick people can claim VAT relief on purchases for personal or domestic use that are applicable to their disability or sickness

This is useful for assisting people to get in and out of bed so long as they sufficent muscle in their upper torso
also it does stop people from rolling out of bed while sleeping although it is not designed for that function

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/...?ie=UTF8&psc=1

There is a frame for the Porta Potti it is expensive imho but it does work and it does provide additional support for someone that is not steady on their legs.
it does allow the portable toilet 3 different height options
lower than standard toilet
standard toilet height
and higher than standard toilet height

https://www.jacksonsleisure.com/cara...obility-frame/
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Old 12th June 2019, 09:53   #113 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

I got to the hospital yesterday and was greeted with "I can go home". After questioning it seems a doctor had told him. I went out to the desk and spoke to the lady doctor there. She said it was her who had told him, as he was medically fit. I said “what about being physically fit? He cannot stand or walk properly”. She said she would have a word with physio team.

A charge nurse came in and said that there was going to be a meeting this afternoon with the doctors, physios, rehabilitation people and social services people. I added “and us” and he said yes of course. He said this would give us the chance to voice any doubts we may have and ask questions. Also to say if we needed help. So far as I am concerned the only help I would like is a rollator and the special cushion he has been sitting on because of the bedsores. The sores have broken out again, but it looks like I will be treating these at home. I have Inadine (brilliant stuff) and Allevyn dressings. I used these on my leg ulcers and they are quite good. I do have some, but I think I might mention to them that I would quite like some to take home. I do wish though that I had had a bit more notice than this. I have moved some things around and taken stuff into the basement out of the way for the time being. But I keep looking at certain areas wondering if I can move any more. Dave said that as long as he can get from the front door to his seat in the lounge relatively easy, he would be happy. I think I have cracked that one.

Then two physio ladies came in and took Dave for a walk with the zimmer. I was quite surprised at how well he did. They were quite pleased too. I said to them that the main worry I had about this is actually getting into the house, as the zimmer cannot be used outside, and there are quite a few steps up to be considered. They said that we wouldn’t need a taxi (as we had previously planned) as hospital transport would be provided. They said their team were expert in getting people into their homes, even those who were bed bound. After they went, Dave said that he would be quite pleased if they could put him in some sort of wheelchair to get him to our front door. He said they could put him inside, and we could take it from there. He is still very anti anyone coming into our home and, as he puts it “nosing around”.

When he went into hospital, I packed him a cabin sized small case, but over the weeks we have added to this. More changes of clothes, more bottles of drink, etc. So I loaded up my trolley with what we considered he would not need. This will only leave the last minute stuff, and the case fits into my trolley. So he will only have to concentrate on walking.

When I got home I decided to tackle the bushes either side of the front door. No – I didn’t do this when I said I would as it had been raining since and the bushes get quite heavy with rain. Anyway, it took about an hour, so I was quite pleased. At about eight o’clock, the chap from across the road came to the door and said that I had left one of the garage doors wide open, and my keys were on the bonnet of my car inside! What a prize prawn! I know how this happened though. I intended to put the bag of cuttings in the garage, but I changed my mind as it was quite big. So I took it through the house and put it in the garden. I had left the front door open whilst I was cutting, so I didn’t even miss the keys! Good job no-one nefarious came along in the three hours since I had finished.

So that is how we are at present. It is quite funny really that a few years ago Dave made the comment that as my legs and hips were getting worse, it was a pity we didn’t think about getting infirm when we bought our house, as there are the stairs to negotiate and another flight down to the basement. But neither of us envisaged that it would be Dave with the problem. Funny old world eh?

Maisie
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Old 12th June 2019, 14:51   #114 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Good news for you (or Dave) .Make sure you use everything on offer to make life easier ,and if its not on offer ask for it, hopefully life will settle back down for you its so tiring travelling to the hospital daily
Take care
Jill x
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Old 13th June 2019, 09:47   #115 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

They say that everything is not as it seems. Well, Dave is home. That is the only good news. We were told on Tuesday that he could go home on Wednesday and hospital transport will take him home. Flash forward 24 hours. Dave is dressed and his bag is packed. We are now waiting for his discharge letter and medications. And we waited, we waited and we waited. Whilst we were waiting, they came with a wheelchair to take Dave to this so called "meeting", at approximately 2.00pm.

Present was a physio lady, a member of the rehab team, a nurse, a doctor (who neither Dave nor I had seen before) and the social worker I had met before but don't like. She is so arrogant and patronising! All we gleaned from this meeting was that they had changed his meds in an endeavour to "control" his blood sugars. I have already commented on this - that they were trying to do in a couple of weeks what medical personnel (including this hospital) has tried to do in the past 43 years and failed.

The social worker gave me her number, "in case you need help", and it was confirmed that hospital transport would be booked. After leaving this meeting Dave was wheeled back into his room and he sat on the bed and we continued to wait. I went outside to return two books he had from their library and the physio was there. She said that everything was booked: his discharge letter had been produced, they were waiting for the pharmacy and the transport was booked.

At about ten to five, a nurse came in and said that Dave would have to stay an extra day as "pharmacy has not done his meds yet and they "leave at five". I exploded! I said that no way were we waiting another day and that I wanted his meds from the locked cupboard in his room. They started arguing about this. (We have had this happen once before, and I threatened to bust the cupboard off the wall if someone did not open it and give us back our property). A nurse appeared with a key! She took out everything and as she was leaving the room, I asked her where she was going. She said that all the meds needed to go to pharmacy. Pardon? What has pharmacy to do with medication he brought in with him? Procedure we were told!

They then said the transport had not been booked, as they had to wait until Dave had everything and was literally able to leave. I demanded that they booked this because we were leaving! The nurse came back at about 5.15pm and said it was booked, and they would come and fetch him with a wheelchair. Sounds good? They then dropped the bombshell that only Dave could go in the ambulance! I would have to get home as best I could. However, if I had left then to get a bus, Dave would probably be home before me. He would not be able to get in as I had the door key. I could not give this to him because once the door is open you have 30 seconds to get to the end of the hall to turn off the house alarm. Otherwise it goes off, and police cars come racing round!

We decided sod the hospital transport, we would get a taxi. A doctor came in and said that if we were leaving without his meds, then we had to sign a disclaimer. So I said give it here. I filled it in and Dave signed it. However, I totally obliterated the bit that said that Dave was leaving against medical advice and he also realised that this could be injurious to his health! She went off, but returned almost immediately. She was banging on about how could we leave without his meds etc. etc. I said I have duplicates of everything at home, including both his insulin pens. She said but we have altered his medication. I said that I knew they had changed his long acting insulin from 30 units per day to 8, and that was a big part of why they could not control his blood sugars. I said that when he gets home, he will revert to his original dose. She said he could have a hypo, then what would I do? I told her that during the last 43 years, I had been dealing not only with hypoglycemia but also hyperglycemia and that I was more capable than they seemed to be at dealing with his diabetes. Then she said there is a new tablet. I asked if this was fludrocortisone, as I had discovered they were giving him this. She said it was, and I told her that I would probably be stopping this as when they prescribed this the last time he left hospital, his feet and legs up to his knees just swelled with excess fluid. Our GP took him off them. They say they are necessary to keep his blood pressure up. I told her that a check now would probably see his blood pressure way way up. As a parting shot I asked that if I rang today to see if his letter and meds were available, would I have to wait another 24 hours? Their excuse about this was that the doctor had delayed (no reason given) signing Dave off until too late in the afternoon. Afternoon? What happened to telling us the day before that he could leave? Why wasn't he signed off to leave the next day? No answer were forthcoming. I told them that I would be contacting PALS to complain about his treatment.

So, we got a taxi. Smashing driver, he had a ramp that he pulled out for Dave to walk up with his zimmer. The first taxi couldn't take us as Dave couldn't get up the step into it. The driver did say that he thought it wrong they were discharging him in this condition. When we got home, I came in and did the alarm, and the driver got out and helped Dave right into the house. He couldn't have been more helpful. After he had gone, we made the first mistake. We got him into the lounge, with considerable difficulty as the zimmer is too wide to go through some of the gaps in the furniture. Can't move furniture, firstly too heavy and secondly, to where? Anyway I made him a cup of tea. Half way through he said that he was worn out and wanted to go to bed.

He got to the lounge door and fell! I could not get him up because he said his arms and legs would not work. So he sort of crawled along the hall to the stairs. He got up these reasonably easy on his bum. However, he could not stand at the top. So he had to crawl along to the bedroom door and then to the bed. He then totally collapsed on the floor. I thought, should I now telephone that horrible woman from social services? Probably too late at 9 o'clock at night. At that time, you are on your own! With hindsight we should have put him to bed first whilst he still had a bit of use in his legs. Eventually I had to 'phone our son and ask him to come and help. He arrived and tried to get Dave to his feet, but he couldn't hold on and his legs were buckling. Son got behind him, sat him up and picked him up completely and put him on the bed! So easy when you know how. Although I wouldn't be able to do this.

I got him undressed, changed the incontinence pad and he was happy - just go to sleep. Then he said that he thought he was "going". I checked - he was right. So another round of changing. He said he would now go to sleep. I got into bed, and that was that. However, at 3.30am he woke me to say he had again "been". Same procedure all over again. This morning he is quite tired, but not in need of any changing. He said that after last night, he now knows that he will not be able to get to the toilet across the hall, particularly as the zimmer will not go through. In our house, when you get to the top of the stairs, the landings go both left and right. The toilet is to the right, and our bedroom is down a short landing to the left. No negotiating room.

I had to find some morphine after the early morning events so that he could get to sleep. Quite honestly, seeing how he is, I really do not think they should have discharged him. They have not addressed the reason he went in - not diabetes, but falling over because of the pain in his leg. Both legs now look so thin, there is more meat on the sparrows in the garden! I don't know how to address this. I have bought a bedpan, which should be here today or tomorrow via courier. Until then, Dave will just have to stay in bed as he is. I am positive that at present he could not reach the toilet. Or even if he did, he would not be able to get back.

The hospital personnel were saying that he just needs exercise to "build up his legs". I agree to some extent, but what were they doing during the seven weeks he was in hospital about exercising? Answer - nothing, they just told him he could not get out of bed. So he has got gradually worse by them keeping him in bed. Perhaps this is some new treatment to strengthen failing legs. I don't think so.

I am so mad I could spit! He is much worse now than when he went into hospital. At the meeting, the physio said that she would request a team come and exercise (?) his legs. But this will take "4 - 6 weeks as there is a backlog". In the meantime, someone will come in within "the first week or so", but they will only be the "emergency" team. My own personal opinion is that he was not fit to be discharged. But as things stand, he discharged himself. But only because they would not give him his meds back so he could leave as they had previously promised the day before.

So that is us for now. Dave stays in bed and I go out. I will telephone in an hour or so to see if I can get the meds. As things have gone wrong so far, they will probably say they can only give them to Dave! To pre-empt this, I am going to get him to sign a letter I can take with me. When I get back, I will begin composing a letter to PALS.

Maisie
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Old 13th June 2019, 10:57   #116 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Oh Maisie, poor you and Dave. This is so reminiscent of our local hospital who discharged my Aunt home last year when imho she just wasn't fit. The trouble is they are so short of beds they will get rid of practically anyone who has a pulse. I rang her GP immediately Aunty arrived home and it was obvious she wouldn't be able to cope - she couldn't get in or out of bed or get to the toilet in addition to being in agony and a worse state than when she was admitted. The GP was spitting feathers when she saw my poor Aunty and had her readmitted immediately. When she was discharged again a couple of weeks later it was to a home where she could recuperate and build up her strength to finally be able to cope in her own home. Ring your GP and get that letter to PALS written. Hope thing get better for you and Dave.
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Old 13th June 2019, 11:02   #117 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Maisie I do feel for you. Iím spitting on your behalf!
Wonderful NHS. Just chuck more money at them. That will solve everything.
If youíre old it seems that you donít count, despite all the money youíve paid out over the years. They also assume that youíre senile.
Hardly in the same league as your problems I know, but when I used to take my Mum to hospital the consultant spoke to me as if Mum wasnít there! I had a few words with him about that.
Keep strong and make sure you look after yourself.
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Old 13th June 2019, 12:09   #118 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Any letter you write complaining about the treatment of your husband make sure you send copies to Pals, the director of the hospital he was in and also the head of the NHS in England, Simon Stevens.

We had a similar situation with my mother and all they wanted to do was get rid of her and free up a bed space. I did complain in writing and sent copies to everyone. It took 6 months to get an apology after pointing out all their failings.

It is very hard for you and a lot of needless worry and work disrupting your lives, but don't give up.
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Old 13th June 2019, 14:28   #119 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

Thanks for the advice everyone. I will certainly copy my letter to those mentioned. As you go into the hospital, you first come into Costa Coffee. On the wall quite plainly for all to see, is a "map" of the hierarchy in the hospital. So I will jot down some names from that when I go for the meds.

I rang the hospital at noon. Well, the letter was there but no meds. They were expecting them "any time now". They said they will telephone when they get them.

I have already decided I am not going alone for these in case there is any backlash from yesterday. Our son is coming with me. He always wears his id badge, so that anybody looking can see he is "in the same game" so to speak.

Dave is still in bed. Watching Rumpole of the Bailey on the TV. He says he feels much better than how he ended yesterday. So now I am again waiting for someone else to do their job!!!

Maisie
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Old 13th June 2019, 16:22   #120 (permalink)
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Re: My Bolshie Husband

This is enough to make a saint cry! A bit of competition would help as the NHS in my opinion is a self-serving monolith. It has no reason to clear backlogs as it would make itself largely redundant. Meanwhile we pay into a system that is going broke paying huge amounts of interest on PFIs going to fat cats that can afford private care.
The reason for them asking about home and help is because the assessment is for 'ADLs'; activities of daily living. You have to fail all of them. Washing, dressing, mobility, feeding, and toilet. It makes it even more important to have something to fall back on. Long term care plans are not good value either, expensive and riddled with small print exclusions.
Don't ever fall ill in Wales either. The Welsh NHS is awful. A friend has just had months of unnecessary chemo because of a misdiagnosis; another has had to have breast reconstruction redone because it was so bad, I was bounced off a list for asking for an appointment more than 6 weeks in advance, then told it would be another 10 - 12 months before being seen when put on another one with a new appointment it was cancelled within a week. Another friend has waited 4 years in agony for a new hip, she's too polite and nice, eventually got it done after collapsing in the GP surgery. Not the GPs fault. Her son took her to Moorfields to get her cataracts done privately after 2 years wait and seeing only in black and white.
I needed a cataract op; having looked at the planning papers for Wales NHS health boardsI found that in 2017 they had a backlog of 41,000 yes, fortyone thousand patients still waiting for a first appointment at eye clinics for glaucoma etc. The solution they offered was a nurse practitioner led clinic in Withybush hospital (Haverfordwest) which would take 56 extra per month.I'd be blind before I got there! There have already been reports of people waiting so long in Wales they are now inoperable and going blind. Withybush is now slated for closure.
Meanwhile a friend in Somerset was offered a choice of 6 different eye clinics with waiting times between a week and about 100 days. How is there such a difference?
Anyway I swore I would sort it here in Turkey and would not go back to UK without a 'new' eye. It's a more difficult op because of previous surgery on the eye and a risk of collapse, but it's been done here in Turkey without fuss or delay,and now I can see again, wonderful!
Sorry Maisie, I've hijacked your story. I think we are a few of the thousands who have been messed around. It's not lack of money that has caused these problems, it's lack of imagination and allowing consultants to do private practice alongside NHS work. They should be all in or all out.
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