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Old 14th May 2014, 17:14   #21 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.



A pretty little girl named Suzy was standing on the pavement in front of her home. Next to her was a basket containing a number of tiny creatures; in her hand was a sign announcing FREE KITTENS.


Suddenly a line of big black cars pulled up beside her. Out of the lead car stepped a bald, grinning man.

"Hello little girl, I'm President Zuma. What do you have in the basket?" he asked.

"Kittens," little Suzy said.

"How old are they?" asked Zuma.

Suzy replied, "They're so young, their eyes aren't even open yet."

"And what kind of kittens are they?"

"ANC," answered Suzy with a smile.

Zuma was delighted. As soon as he returned to his car, he called his PR department and told them about the little girl and the kittens.

Recognizing the perfect publicity opportunity, they agreed that the president should return the next day; and in front of the assembled media, have the girl talk about her discerning kittens.

So the next day, Suzy was again standing on the pavement with her basket of "FREE KITTENS," when the motorcade pulled up, this time followed by all the media.

Cameras and audio equipment were quickly set up, then Zuma got out of his car and walked over to little Suzy.

"Hello, again," he said, "I'd love it if you would tell all my friends out there what kind of kittens you're giving away."

"Yes sir," Suzy said. "They're D A."

Taken by surprise, the president stammered, "But... but... yesterday, you told me they were ANC."




Little Suzy smiled and said, "I know. But today, they have their eyes open."
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Old 6th June 2014, 13:17   #22 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

Progress Africa style.

These are pictures of a sugar/citrus/banana farm right next to Ngwenya Lodge in Komatipoort, South Africa.

It was sold to (taken by) the SA Government in 2007 in their land reform and re-allocation program whereby the
riches of the evil white man are distributed among the less advantaged, oppressed "indigenous" community (i.e. Black Economic Empowerment).

This is what it looked like when the previous owners thought they were going to look at the development of their old homestead and farm.

They matched each scene (Aug 2011) with a 'before' photo (Jan 2007).







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Old 6th June 2014, 19:22   #23 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

Perhaps if they had a load of white geezers slogging their guts out for bu99er all day and night , it might look different.

Steve.
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Old 6th June 2014, 19:39   #24 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

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Originally Posted by Akasya View Post
Perhaps if they had a load of white geezers slogging their guts out for bu99er all day and night , it might look different.

Steve.
Farm workers in SA get free food and accommodation plus at least minimum wage.

As these farms have been stolen from the white farmers and given without cost to the workers youd think that it would make sense for them to capitalize on the produce but the indigenous mind doesnt work like that.

Another Zimbabwe in the making.
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Old 4th July 2014, 20:21   #25 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

Scientists at CERN in Geneva have announced the discovery of the HEAVIEST element yet known to science!

AND yes . . . . . it was discovered in South Africa

The new element is Governmentium (Gv). It has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lefton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons or protons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes in contact.

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction normally taking less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. All of the money is consumed in the exchange, and no other by-products are produced.
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Old 12th July 2014, 19:02   #26 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.


On a recent trip to the US, Julius Malema, President of the EFF (Black Power) party, addressed a major gathering of Red Indians.

He spoke for almost an hour on his plans for South Africa.

At the conclusion of his speech, the crowd presented him with a plaque inscribed with his new Indian name - Walking Eagle.

A very chuffed Malema then departed in his motorcade, waving to the crowds.

A news reporter later asked one of the Indians how they came to select the new name given to Malema.

They explained that Walking Eagle is the name given to a bird so full of sh*t that it can no longer fly.
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Old 12th July 2014, 20:36   #27 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaycey View Post
Farm workers in SA get free food and accommodation plus at least minimum wage.

As these farms have been stolen from the white farmers and given without cost to the workers youd think that it would make sense for them to capitalize on the produce but the indigenous mind doesnt work like that.

Another Zimbabwe in the making.
Agreed.
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Old 12th July 2014, 20:38   #28 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Akasya View Post
Perhaps if they had a load of white geezers slogging their guts out for bu99er all day and night , it might look different.

Steve.
Wouldn`t happen as they would all be on benefits.
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Old 4th August 2014, 11:10   #29 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

.
A brilliant little sketch on the Safrican national anthem....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDEwXwu6Sn4&sns=em
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Old 31st August 2014, 15:17   #30 (permalink)
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Re: Post-apartheid South Africa.

Racist Test ...

I was asked if I would like President Zuma any better if he were white.



I said No so I guess Im not a racist after all.
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